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Dear Toddlers

2013-02-08 09.51.10

Dear Toddlers,

You are fun and frustrating and full of energy. Pure energy that suddenly implodes, often unpredictably, but usually nothing a quick nap or mama snuggles can’t fix.

Or a snack. Like a cookie. That always perks you right up.

I do have a few questions for you though. Things that have been weighing on my mind as I observe you in your natural habitats. Solo or in a pack – it doesn’t matter. Feel free to answer as many of these questions as you can, okay?

  1. What is so fascinating about the cat’s water?
  2. And the cat’s food?
  3. And tail and ears? Okay – the whole cat?
  4. Why do you lick random things like windows, mirrors, and screen doors?
  5. What is the deal with Wonder Pets?
  6. Who taught you selective hearing techniques?
  7. Can you read minds? I swear as soon as I think “don’t touch [insert item here]” you touch it.
  8. Did you study DVD player manuals while in the womb?
  9. What’s in your nose? You are constantly digging for something.
  10. Do you have a secret food source or do you somehow convert air into fuel?

I’ll stop there for now. You really do fascinate me, especially when around others of your own kind. I recently witnessed a group of toddlers who could not keep straight who’s juice box was who’s despite the different colored straws. Some of you had just met that day, yet you all kept trading juices and straws. Well, trading might imply too much. You would just pick up whatever one looked good or was the closest to you at any given time. I saw no less than 3 of you share one straw.

I could never do that at a party.

Or your fingers reaching into the bathroom sink drain or down the back of your diaper… you sem to lack all concept of gross, yuck, ew, and germs. Please advise me on how to convey the nastiness without fear of making you be a germaphobe? I want somewhere in the middle… you know, enough so I don’t have to worry about where your fingers have been before you try to stick them in your baby brother’s mouth.

Love Always,


*Linking up to Mama Kat


Tuesday 5th of March 2013

haha! I feel you on all of these! Baby D licked my arm this morning and then went to get a towel to wipe it off, so....I guess that makes it better? Silly toddlers!

Darcy Zalewski

Saturday 9th of March 2013

LOL that's a move in the right direction, I think.


Monday 4th of March 2013

Hilarious, and all great questions I would love to know the answer to! Especially why my daughter insists on playing in and/or tipping the water dish. She also likes to lick mirror and windows- I thought it was because she could see her reflection and was giving herself a kiss. You're right, there is probably a better explanation, if only toddlers could explain!

Darcy Zalewski

Saturday 9th of March 2013

Yes! Why oh why? Her toys, fingers and toes cannot stay out of the cat water. She started out kissing the mirror but has moved to full on licking it - so gross! She licks screen doors too. *shudder* Building immunity?


Friday 1st of March 2013

Yeah, seriously, what is the deal with Wonder Pets? My son watches it on Netflix and knows the theme song by heart. And now, here I am, singing it in my head as I type this :)

Darcy Zalewski

Sunday 3rd of March 2013

Those songs are total earworms and get annoying fast!


Thursday 28th of February 2013

Too cute!! daughter and the freezer doors at the grocery store. Partly it was from the cookie she'd eat there and also because it gets a reaction out of me.

Darcy Zalewski

Sunday 3rd of March 2013

I have a hard time not reacting over the licking. It's really quite gross most of the time.


Thursday 28th of February 2013

Yes. Licking. What is the deal with that? and just generally putting their mouths on things. My kid is 5 and he still does that. I hope it'll end soon!

Darcy Zalewski

Sunday 3rd of March 2013

You'd think they'd grow out of it by then. Doesn't help that I've turned it into a big deal.