Things I’m Fearful Of As A First Time Mom
It's normal to have worries and fears throughout pregnancy. Especially as a first time mom, there's a lot of unknowns out there. I do know that some of the things I'm fearful of or worry about are out of my control, some are in my control, and most things will work out just fine.
But… I can't help but think about them here and there.
Especially when I'm having an emotional roller coaster of a day. Sometimes it comes out of seemingly no where!
I developed this list when responding to a thread in one of the birthclub groups I'm a part of on Babycenter. It felt kinda good to put the list “in writing” so these fears aren't just aimlessly bouncing around in my head.
I'm afraid I'll struggle with breastfeeding.
I'm afraid of any risks and complications associated with me having gestational diabetes and how it could negatively affect babygirl.
I'm afraid I'll be laid off around the time I start my leave which will mean I can't use sick time to pay for most of it and also means Aflac short term disability won't kick in (contract is up at that time so depends on all that stuff).
I'm afraid we won't be able to afford daycare and that I will have to settle for one that makes me nervous.
I'm afraid I won't want to go back to work but won't be able to afford being a SAHM.
I'm afraid of SIDS.
I'm afraid I'll back off too much in an effort to not appear OVER protective and someone will do something stupid that will hurt her – like drop her on her head or something.
I'm afraid that I'll pick and choose the least effective combination of advice and methods. There is SO much information out there on how to care for a baby; how to feed them; how to get them to sleep; how to respond to them…. and a lot of conflicting information. But even conflicting information doesn't really sound like one way is harmful or better than another. It's a lot to sort through.
I'm afraid… I am going to stop my list there.
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Darcy lives outside of Milwaukee, Wisconsin with her husband, their 8 year old daughter, 6 year old son, two cats, and a rescue dog. She loves to share kids crafts, simple recipes, and parenting tips to help other moms. She's passionate about education (which is why she is a PTO board member and Box Tops Coordinator) and all things babies. Darcy loves purple, geek culture, and making an ordinary life feel extraordinary. She and her family enjoy exploring Wisconsin and planning local adventures. Author of Breastfeeding 101: Beauty in Breastfeeding, available on Amazon. Her writing has also been featured on Babble, CafeMom, and Mom.me.
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Well, I had trouble breastfeeding, and ended up bottle feeding. I still have two beautiful healthy young lads who aren’t ill much of the time, and generally are really good with fending off coughs and colds.
I know quite a few people who’d have GD with their children, and all have gone through pregnancy and birth unharmed. Other than getting to be induced early – which is something I’m jealous of having had to wait 5 days past due for Zack and 13 days past due with Max (he was in my womb for TEN MONTHS.. TEN FREAKIN MONTHS!)
You will find a way financially. I know how hard it is, but it can be done.
I still worry if Max sleeps in (which he’s been doing a lot in the last few months) that SIDS may have taken him. It’s a natural worry, but don’t let it take over your life! Make sure baby is put down in the cot with it’s feet at the bottom of the cot, and on it’s back.
I’ve dropped both boys at some point or other, I remember Max falling back off my legs and whacking his heid on the coffee table. I was horrified with myself, but he was fine. These newborns are much *much* hardier than we think!
At the end of the day, follow your instincts. None of us have a clue what we’re doing when we have a new baby. Hell, even now I still don’t have a clue what I’m doing a lot of the time – I just wing it, and I’ve been told how polite Zack is, and what a happy contented child Max is, so I must be doing something right.
*hugs* You are going to be a wonderful mother to your little one, I just know it. The fact that you have all these worries just shows how much you LOVE your lil babby with all your heart already.
xxx
Oooft, that was a huge comment, sorry! 😉 x
First of all.. *big hugs* All these concerns are completely normal and just prove what a great mum you’re going to be!
[I’m afraid I’ll back off too much in an effort to not appear OVER protective and someone will do something stupid that will hurt her – like drop her on her head or something.]
Don’t worry about this. Instinct will kick in and you’ll be th perfect level of protectiveness. Just listen to your gut. You’ll find with some people you’ll be more relaxed, other’s you’ll be more on edge. Remember that YOU are this baby’s mother and have the final say on what anyone else can do!
I’m sure you’ll do fine.
[I’m afraid that I’ll pick and choose the least effective combination of advice and methods…]
Again, just trust your instincts. Please DO NOT worry about what ANYONE else has to say – even family. YOU do what’s best for YOUR family. Trust yourself, that’s the only advice you need to know.
I had the best laid plans for when Miss S was born and it was all pretty much thrown out the window lol. I unknowingly adopted a very ‘attachment parenting’ lifestyle and it’s worked brilliantly. I coped a lot of comments (rod for your own back blah blah) from mostly the older generation, but they could say what they wanted. At the end of each and every day they weren’t there, it was MY family. And I did what we felt was right.
The best advice I was ever given when pregnant was to “Listen to everything, take on board what you feel right with and ignore the rest”.
You’re gonna do great!
Thank you both! I try not to let any of these things drive me crazy, but I can’t completely shut them out. I do appreciate your reassurances. I’m going to do the best I can 🙂
Or you look at the directions
Dad Z
Do the directions come out before or after the baby does?